So this is so-and-so much tiring days in the city I choose to spend my college time at. My belly feels little empty, but I pretty sure I’m yet that lazy to buy some food downstairs. But then I remembered my promise to my boyfriend about eating stuffs, so I take my jacket and go downstairs searching for something to eat. It’s already, like, about eight o’clock, P.M of course.
I can’t called it holiday, but yes, many students had finished their academic thingy for this semester. So in the time like this, which is eight P.M, the street seems pretty vacant and a little bit dark than usually. I walked alone with my wallet and hand phone both in my right hand, my head was thinking about many-many things that could be thought. First popping question is, why I stay here when bunch of my friends go back their home? Easy to answer, it’s because I still have several responsibilities here, not a hard thing to do, I confess. But yeah, it could make me stay here at the end. Then why I still have those several responsibilities when my friend can freely go back their home doing some fun things? By this question, I trapped in the shallow pond of insecurity. Rat was run over my feet, makes me little bit startled.
Why you always be like this, ta? This question couldn’t wait patiently to be answered. But I won’t answer instead of giving a question. Always be like what? What do you try to bring me to? I stated a rhetorical question.
Always be like this, pick some responsibilities, phlegmatically do several things that others wouldn’t do, where the heck are the benefit for you? For your friends? For your parents? Why you always want to do some little things that just make you tired? And remember, no one notice about what you’ve already done.
I take a very deep breath. I let the question pouring me down. I have nothing to do with the answers. I just realized asking question is much easy than giving a rational answers. I didn’t wanna think about the answer. To be honest, I didn’t wanna think about anything, I was hungry and search some food to eat. That’s all.
Where the heck is your achievement? It been a year and you still have nothing to makes your parents proud about. Winning something? Be a delegate of something something? Being someone something?
It been a year and you still have nothing to makes your parents proud about.
It been a year and nothing to makes your parents proud.
It been a year and nothing.
It been a year.
I decided to buy some bread to eat. I was just able to eat something light, suddenly.
Where the heck is your achievement?
What are you doing in this whole year, tita adelia?
Nothing. I finally answered.
I just do some sightseeing look for something interesting in this great diversity of humanity and love properly the peoples I loved. That’s all what I do.
I gobbled the bread. Drinking some water, then continuing read a book like I always do to spend the lonely night.
So um, may I say sorry for my nothingness?
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