A fine dilemma

To make a clear prejudice in the very beginning, here I declare that this isn't about my own relationship (it may have some impact to this writing but I don't know where the exact point is). My position here as a life time observer and friends of many kind of person who was involved, involve, and will involve in a relationship itself. I find it peculiarly confusing so I just want to share my confusion.

There is a fine dilemma on how's the relationship supposed to be. If it supposed to be care with each other, how far they two should care. How far they two could called as 'they didn't care anymore'. How is the proper standard for 'care' itself. If the one feels care enough when the other one didn't, what standard do they should obey. And vice versa, if the one willing to shows they care-ness when the other get it annoying, although there will be no rigid standard, who is right and who is wrong. The one who being care or annoyed?

There is a fine dilemma on how's the relationship supposed to be. If it supposed to be being tolerant to each other faults, how far they two should bear. Not to counting each other take and give points, but really, do they should keep rational or just stay irrational for the sake of love. Sometimes rationality wouldn't make their relationship works cause there're much more thing beyond. Sometimes irrationality trapped them two, in a deep pond of fragile lullaby (which is dangerous?). But the worst is, when the one want to keep it realistic and the other one more likely to connive in the irrational side. Which one they should choose. Do they should choose? Yes they do, at least to compromise which quadrant do they stand together.

There is a fine dilemma on how's the relationship supposed to be. How far the significant other take part in it. Do they keep their friends, family, to be the 'supporter' of the relationship or they should put it on the core of relationship. Is a relationship without the significant other's permissions still have to be works? Is a relationship with the cherish of significant other have to be works, like they have a special duties to eliminate the obstacles?

There is a fine dilemma on how's the relationship supposed to be. If it supposed to be accompanying each other through anything, bad times and good times, when they did not, what's left to make the relationship work still? To decide whether it called a proper 'accompanying' through good times and bad times with each other presence, another problem appealingly come. 'He/she not here when I need him/her the most', that sentence, how many they two should bear. When is the right time to say enough and goodbye, and when is the time to keep holding on. To follow emotion and say a too soon goodbye, a great regret that hard to heal will rise. To just act cool and fine with the hidden loneliness (while you are actually in the relationship), another unfunny misery will emerge.

There is a fine dilemma on how's the relationship supposed to be. Maybe a good communication can help.And the forgiveness. And set aside the ego. And the other positive things. But frankly there're very speak-able variables but not really applicable.

I don't know. I randomly remember this phrase, someone who fall in love should never look back. I think it have some good value to see this confusion. Whatever, should never look back.

Ah. I don't know.

Yes we're perfect but the timing are not.
We are both young, just, so young.
We still have many things we want to do just by ourselves.
And I think because we're so perfect, may the universe will let us be together later in life.

Fatamorgana

For them who are blind, have a vision to see many kind of colors, kind of shapes, is too much to ask.
For them who are deaf, to go to a concert with sort of friends enjoying the beat of music, is too much to ask.
For them who are poor, sitting in the car listening itouch then daydreamin, is too much to ask. They didn't even ate last night.
For them who are homeless, fluffy blanket soft mattress comfy pillow, is too much to ask.
For them who are popular, walking in the park buying ice cream without any paparazzi noticing them, is too much to ask.
For them who are just broke up, smoothly turning the lover into friend, is sometimes too much to ask. Thing isn't as simple as that.
For them who are motherless, to see her watching tv while they're busy with their phone, is too much to ask. Even to hear her voice calling their name. Or messaging her for their come-home-late tonight.
For them who are fatherless, waiting him come bring them some supper for the hungry belly, is too much to ask. Even to see his wrinkles, knowing that he's getting older.

But here's a thing, there's nothing too much to give.
Cause everything you thought you're already have, that's not yours.
You genuinely own nothing, sweetie.

Uncle Mitch

Mitch Albom, seeing his books always success in give me a nostalgic effect. Accompanying me during the Very Difficult Times years ago. 

The Part

There's always a sad part in every component of life. Even when you're on vacation to the places you want all your life, with peoples who love you unconditionally. Even in the beautiful evening, red shyly sky, a cup of tea and your favorite book on your lap, chill air breezing. Even when you just bought the cds of your favorite singer that you hunt for a long harsh time. Even when you got a birthday surprise with many presents and joy and greetings. Even when you graduated from a high school which worth your bones and bloods. Even when you won a competition called a worldwide event which is prestigious beyond your parents' expectation. Even when your messages are replied quickly by your crush. Even when your friends praise your nice simply thought, satisfied by your works, addicted to your presence. Even when you are now thinking about the happiest moment of your life.

I considered myself can't be really one hundred percent happy. Perhaps there are memories which always remains, memories of bitterness, memories of lost, memories of anything that definitely couldn't be erased. Memories which we ourselves recognized as things that shaped us. 

And that's okay. Cause there's always a breath of relief inside your heart in every phases you through. Even when you failed. Even when you're being rejected. Even when you lost something or someone who are very, very important for your life. Even when you're leaved by things you actually want to be with them forever. Even when you didn't have a thing that the others might have. Even when you make your beloved person down by your unplanned acts. Even when you are now thinking about the worst phases of your life.

The breath of relief inside your heart suits the sad part just fine. The ups and downs, you will always be fine.